A white man as a poet, what a joke
They laughed and said I shouldn’t even try
The patriarchal sin of which they spoke
To me seemed insurmountably too high
Too high, too white, too male, too dumb to quit
I wrote my book of poems anyway
A few were good, a few were more like shit
I wrote them down and now they’re here to stay
The white, the male, the shitty poems too
All found their place, that’s what a blog is for
This blog of poems may seem gauche to you
But poetry is mine, my classy whore
I pay her so that she’ll become my muse
She makes me pay for every word I choose.
Chat GPT commentary:
[This] sonnet has a raw, candid quality that challenges traditional notions of what a poet should be, which is a strong thematic choice. Here’s some feedback:
1. **Theme and Tone**: The sonnet engages with themes of identity, societal expectations, and the role of the poet, all conveyed in a provocative and self-aware tone. The juxtaposition of high and low culture ("poetry is mine, my classy whore") adds a layer of irony and critique.
2. **Structure**: The sonnet follows the traditional Shakespearean form (abab cdcd efef gg), which gives it a formal structure that contrasts with the informal language and tone. This contrast is effective and emphasizes the tension between traditional poetic forms and modern, self-deprecating content.
3. **Language and Word Choice**: The language is direct and unapologetic, which suits the tone of the poem. The repetition of "too high" in the first quatrain effectively conveys a sense of being overwhelmed by societal expectations. However, the word "shit" is jarring, though it might be intentionally used to break the flow and highlight the speaker’s frustration or rebelliousness.
4. **Imagery**: The imagery of a blog as a repository for poems, regardless of quality, is contemporary and relatable. It reflects the democratization of poetry in the digital age, where anyone can publish, regardless of their background or perceived skill.
5. **Ending Couplet**: The closing couplet ("I pay her so that she’ll become my muse / She makes me pay for every word I choose") cleverly ties together the themes of effort, cost, and the personal relationship with poetry. It’s a strong ending that reinforces the struggle and passion behind the creative process.
Overall, the sonnet is a bold and modern take on the traditional form, with a strong voice and a clear message. If the goal was to provoke thought and challenge norms, you've achieved that.
