Sonnettics

Control, she says, and slides between my thoughts
Which bore no fruit, no word, no inky stain
To call a line, a verse for half a day
While I slipped in and out of reverie
Control, she says again and slides into
My lap, my papers scattered to the floor
My pen held loosely in my lazy hand
Her hand already pushing it aside
Control, she whispers now through “fuck me” lips
And slides her blouse without a metaphor
Above her breasts–I kiss her naked skin
I see a poem, but I hear her say–
You try too hard to write sometimes, my love
Tonight I think you should just let it go

I woke because the vision was unclear
Too far away the dream I wanted near
A dawn of beauty rising in the east
The dream ungrasped, the vision unreleased
At times an angel living in my skin
A softness and a passion welcomed in
At times like now a sun behind a cloud
A fire both undenied and unallowed
Alone I wandered words that would not end
Because my muse had others to attend
But trusting in her ever-promised light
I rose to face the morning and to write
And as the vision cleared from east to west
I saw the infant daughter at her breast

for Asia

I saw the sun explode behind the trees
At dusk, before I dragged myself to bed
I felt a surge of promised distant peace
But something else slipped in my weary head

Perhaps the shade of purple in the cloud
The sun had touched was just one shade too dark
Perhaps the distant rain fell like a shroud
Upon some distant lovers in some park

I know the vision that my eyes beheld
Was missed by many others on that night
As all the highest joys the scene compelled
Collapsed before the sun withdrew his light

From where I stand, such beauty should be clear
Unless it is refracted by a tear

rewritten as “Sunset” and sold on fiverr

I watch the sun set just behind the trees
At dusk, before I drag myself to bed.
I feel the promise of tomorrow’s peace,
But something else slips in my weary head.

Perhaps the shade of purple in one cloud
Touched by the sun is just one shade too dark.
Perhaps the distant rain falls like a shroud
Upon some distant lovers in some park.

I know the vision that my eyes can see
Is missed by many others on this night,
As all the love that shines on you and me
Shines on although the sun withdraws its light.

From where I stand such beauty should be clear
Unless it’s hidden by a lonely tear.

At First

At first you pass your lover on the street
And only vaguely feel the heat arise
This future love whom you have yet to meet
You’ve met and yet you only caught their eyes

At first you simply lay there in your skin
And try to sleep while dreams employ your hands
Those eyes you caught have now evolved within
Your needs and wants have now become demands

At first you simply seek to find release
To cool the fever burning you each night
Until you want the burning to increase
And so consume you ’til the morning light

You pass again the eyes which now you seek
You stop. Your lover stops. You turn and speak.

At Last

At last you’re close enough to feel the heat
Escape the lips that vainly held it in
That breath which heaves a sigh is incomplete
Without an ear to breathe the sigh within

At last you let your bodies briefly touch
A brush of hair, your fingertips, your cheeks
Some place where you were void of clothes and such
The words you lacked, your touching quickly speaks

At last your fingers find the will to slide
Beside, between, beneath, behind, below
Flirtation’s stream has now been swept aside
Engulfed in passion’s grand torrential flow

You lose yourselves together in this time
You find yourselves a part of love sublime

And Now

And now you’re sliding up to keep the pace
Demanded by the rising of your sex
And now the blood begins to burn your face
And melt the muscles waiting there to flex

And now you smell the salt within the sweat
The sweat in every pore, on every hair
And now your skin remembers to forget
That all it has to do is feel, not care

And now staccato breath is all your voice
You ‘ah’ and ‘ah’ and ‘ah’ as if to say
It’s gone, my self is gone, I have no choice
And now your love consumes your love away

You mount, you rise, you scream, you laugh, you cry
You live, you give, you take, you are, you die

Are you so blind you didn’t see me cry
When you walked past me on your way to class
Or did you think that you could just pass by
And just ignore my broken heart of glass
I didn’t hide my face you stupid boy
I guess I really thought that you might care
My tears are not a thing that I enjoy
But they are not the depth of my despair
I’m drowning in a sea of tears and pain
Because I love you more than I can say
But you ignore me like a drop of rain
That falls behind you as you walk away
And all that I can do there on the ground
Is hope that something makes you turn around

My precious boy, my stupid, precious boy
I know you think I’m just a silly girl
Who likes to tease, to pout, and to annoy
To turn your mind into a savage whirl
I know you think I haven’t got a brain
That’s just the start of your stupidity
I know you feel I’m driving you insane
With vague assaults on your lucidity
But if my adoration is in doubt
And if you think my love is just a game
You haven’t got a clue what love’s about
And, stupid, precious boy, that is a shame
Because in spite of every stupid part
I love you from the bottom of my heart

Your touch is like an invitation home
Familiar in its warmth and tenderness
But he’s a fool who ever chose to roam
I’d never leave, nor ever touch you less
Your touch is like a magic symphony
Accompanied by pure angelic song
The deaf will never know the misery
I’ve felt without your music for so long
Your touch, my love, is pure consuming fire
Its passion leaps like flames of burning need
How cold a stone to not feel that desire
I burn so easily and with such speed
Once touched by you I’ve never felt so much
Both flesh and soul forever know your touch

It’s clear, I see it now, the mess I’ve made
I hope you know I was a little drunk
Don’t go, don’t run, oh please don’t be afraid
I’ll clean it up, I’ll clear away the junk
Don’t cry my dear at all the broken glass
At all the shards of china on the floor
They were just gifts; I’ll put them in the trash
Just wait, just stand there just outside the door
The blood? What blood? It’s just a little scratch
Don’t call the cops; don’t call an ambulance
I know we’ll make it through this latest patch
It’s rough but we’ve both done it more than once
Okay, okay, I’ll help you get your trunk
But don’t you know I was a little drunk

I placed a velvet pillow on my lap
For some obscure contingency at best
In case she stretched, preparing for a nap
Or simply wanted some new place to rest
As red as blood the pillow rose and fell
With every breath I chose to breathe in time
More red than blood and warm as deepest hell
More soft than poetry that doesn’t rhyme
Imagine if you will her flowing hair
Obscuring every inch of softest red
Pretend she’s like a lion in a lair
I move to place my hand upon her head
Enough! I’ll spend another night alone
With every memory of her I’ve known

They say my heart is fine, but all they see
Is lines upon a graph which rise and fall
Electric pulses through their EKG
A record of the beats both large and small
They say my heart is strong, without disease
But they can only guess what caused the pain
Because I passed their treadmill test with ease
And every scan their hospitals contain
And glad to pass this happy news along
I call you on the phone to let you know
That there is absolutely nothing wrong
They say there’s not, and so it must be so
But at the moment when I hear you speak
I feel within my chest my heart goes weak